by Barry Kerr and Kristine Gay

Believe it or not, your beliefs determine your destiny. Sometimes, this is obvious. For example, if you don’t believe you can write a book, then how would you? But it’s the hidden and emotionally formed core beliefs that have a more profound, persistent impact. These are the beliefs you don’t know you believe. In fact, quite often, what people claim to believe is contrary to what they really believe down in their gut.

A young woman came to us reporting how she felt inspired years ago to go back to school for her master’s degree. The problem was that each time she began to set things in motion to make it happen, something would interfere. The first time, she broke up with her boyfriend and felt too disheveled to start school. A year later, just before she had to pay her tuition, she felt a calling to travel abroad. Though she enjoyed her travels, she felt frustrated and once again longed for more education. This pattern continued for several years.

We invited her to bring her awareness to her body and let it “speak” to her. Bodies hold energies of memories, decisions, beliefs, etc. In this way, she became aware that she had adopted a belief as a young girl. Her belief was that she should not surpass her mother’s achievements in life, that it would be disrespectful and hurtful to her mother. This surprised her immensely. She had never before been aware of this belief. Intellectually, as an adult, she would support anyone’s right to further their education. However, she could now see how repeated subtle messages from her mother and her family had shaped her core belief at a subliminal level. She could see how this belief, though helping her feel emotionally accepted as a child, was now sabotaging her efforts to further her schooling.

This dissonance between intellectual and actual beliefs is universal. It surfaces when clients are experiencing blocks, conflicts and other unwanted outcomes. And it’s one of the best reasons to hire a healer, coach or therapist. A skilled professional can sense what you aren’t seeing and help you see it. More importantly, once seen, you can change it.

There are many ways to do this, including theta healing, energy dialogue and inner parts work. The best processes circumvent the logical mind and help you connect beyond your ego to your higher self, a source of truth not limited to what your five physical senses can tell you. When you access your greater self, the beliefs you hold hidden are brought to light either for tweaking and strengthening, or for healing and transformation.

Our cultures have always pointed to this capacity that we all have within. Ironically, the same cultures have also instilled beliefs that actually get in the way of our connection to our higher self, becoming some of the most frequent dysfunctional and unconscious beliefs we encounter. So ingrained into the fabric of our society have these become that they’ve gone unseen and unquestioned by most people. And even those who question the “norms” don’t always realize how deeply they are still affected by them. We’ve met many liberal and progressive people who, when they dig deep enough, are surprised to find old, childhood and cultural beliefs still secretly running their lives, long after they intellectually rejected those same beliefs.

In the journey toward conscious living, it’s important to actively seek these out. Life itself often naturally exposes some of these for you, but getting help from an experienced guide can speed up this process by years, if not decades. The result is to feel a full alignment and integrity between what you think and say and what you hold in your core as true. You can feel the difference and see the results.

In the process, you naturally develop your intuitive connection to your soul’s wisdom. Over time, you identify yourself less as ego and more as soul. Your need to believe evolves into your ability to know, intuitively, and then your thoughts, feelings and actions spring confidently and authentically from this ongoing experience with spirit. With less dissonance within, your life flows with more fulfillment. Your destiny is changed.

Barry Kerr, a certified life and relationship coach, and Kristine Gay, a licensed psychotherapist, own Choose Conscious Living in Madison. Both have extensive training in soul-guided healing of mind, body, heart and spiritual systems. They offer healing, coaching, therapy, mindfulness and astrology services for singles, couples and groups. For more information, visit http://www.ChooseConsciousLiving.com. Call for a free consultation and questions.